Come find joy again with me.

I feel like this is the quietest I’ve ever been on social media from social media began lol.

I’ve been pretty quiet because my dad got very sick over the last few months and all my focus has been on that. People always say ohhh real happy people NEVER post on social media they are too busy enjoying the moment etc and while that is true to an extent, it’s the opposite for me. I post more when I am happy generally, I love sharing happy things and parts of my life (probably over sharing most of the time), maybe that’s why I went into marketing. I’ve written 5 different blogs about my experience over the last while but writing one on my journey to finding joy again whilst going through a hard time seemed more fitting for me, and for a few close friends who have also been going through some pretty hard times too. 

It’s mad you always just think your parents are invincible, in fact we probably just think everyone in our lives are invincible and will be around for ever and I suppose getting reminders that they aren’t can help make you cherish the time you have left a bit more. My dad is still here, he is still very sick but he is a trooper and hopefully will be here for a wee bit longer. His illness hasn’t been your normal type of illness, it’s been a crazy, scary, traumatic one and one that I have found so hard and heartbreaking to watch. He’d squeal if he new I was writing about him in my blogs so if any of you ever see him never let on 🤣. He doesn’t read anyway them (as per exhibit A). 

So naturally going through everything pretty much zapped any joy I had going on. I was (still am kind of) super sad, anxious, run down, immune system was in tatters and I was becoming sick because of it all and because of my low vibes I was attracting more low vibe stuff. I literally stopped all exercising too, basically stopped anything that was good for my mental health 😂 but when you feel like that sure taking care of yourself is the last thing you think about. 

Butttttt, looking back I wish I had of done more and it would have helped me so much. So I’m here today to share with you my tips for finding joy again that I learned through my own mistakes of not doing so. I’m not going through all of this for no reason, every day I am learning, becoming stronger, more resilient and I know that it’s a really hard lesson to learn but one that will benefit me in my future. 

1. LISTS

Get your pen and paper, and write down your situation, then list everything that you can control about it. There are certain variables that you literally will never be able to do anything about. For example one thing I can’t control is the outcome of my dads situation, that is out of my hands. What I can control is my reaction to the situation and do small things like having my petrol filled up so I can make the hospital visits easily with out panicking about the petrol light. Or making sure I have change for the parking, honestly the tiniest small little jobs can make such a difference, when you are having a lil break down and there is no petrol in the car or you can’t pay for the parking because the ATM is broke and the machine doesn’t take card, then that just makes your situation worse believe me 😂. The small things matter, and it makes you feel good knowing there are little things that you can control to make life a tiny bit easier. 

2. FOOD

I’ve basically been living off packet sandwich’s, fast food on the way back from hospital and toast. Limited nutrients = feeling more shit than I should be feeling. When I started tracking my food I noticed that I was seriously deficient in a lot of vitamins and minerals and anything that was good for you lol. I got my supplements, probiotics, heaps of fresh fruit and veg. I’m literally addicted to cucumbers now it’s mad when you listen to your body’s cravings it can tell you what you need, normally I’d be craving crisps (have a mad addiction to them it’s wild😂) but nope. Brought in lots of herbal teas into my life too and of course my superhuman tea – the boiled pineapple skin tea, my absolute favourite. A random one that I never even heard of until a few weeks ago was seamoss gel, it makes me gag when I eat it but it has 92 of the 108 minerals that we need in our body’s so il sacrifice the gag for the helffffff.

I noticed on days that I didn’t eat good or skip my supplements I felt extra shit so these are a non negotiable in my life now. Keep an eye on what you might be deficient in and get it from lovely food or supplements if necessary. Don’t get me wrong my diet still isn’t good at all but I feel so much better now I’m making improvements. 

3. MOVE

Who can really be bothered with the gym when you are feeling shit 24/7, not me anyway, but I wish I did go. I tried a couple times but it’s so hard to get back into routine when you fall off it. I’ll get back there though! It’s all about the baby steps. I had hardly been out in nature which is my favourite thing to do ever, so started getting walks in here and there. I feel like I have gym anxiety all over again like when you just start out 😂 the couple of times I did go it was like my brain forgot everything and I just panicked and ran to the stepper lol so for my next session I’ll plan it all out on a wee list on my phone and get back to my thrusters and RDLs. And I’ll have the gym gear all laid out perfectly and maybe a new water bottle to excite me lol. Move in anyway you can, I promise it really does help. 

4. ACCEPT SUPPORT

I must say I am pretty overwhelmed at how lovely and supportive my friends and family have been oh my god. What an amazing bunch of people I have around me. Although what I did do (and still kind of do) is ignore people or say I’m ok when I haven’t been and think I can just handle it all myself. Accept the offer from a friend to go to theirs for a cup of tea or a walk. Even a phone call to just chat through everything your going through. I tend to go into hermit mode when I’m going through shit but I am trying to be better. It’s weird because the one question I hate answering so much is how are you. I haaaaate it and I think I hated it so much because I could pretend I was fine until I get asked that question and then the tears flood. But again, as I said in my previous blogs – if it’s coming up, it’s coming up to go. Feel the emotions and let them out. Anytime I hold them in I get anxious or get a headache so it feels good to get it out. Try to accept any support you deep down think you need, every little helps (don’t sue me Tesco plz). 

Even if you can’t be bothered talking then hang out with a friend and just lie there and don’t even talk, just be. It will help. You could even reach out to a therapist if you don’t feel comfortable opening up to someone you know. Or you can go to a meditation class, there are often DMCs that happen during them and you can end up sharing a lot about your troubles and your life to a group of likeminded strangers and feel amazing for it! I made Debra go to an open heart meditation a few weeks ago and I promised her she wouldn’t have to speak at it but that was a spoof lol we meditated for about an hour and spoke about our experience after. It was amazing! The Bliss Wellness Centre do lots of cool things like this follow them on Instagram if you are into things like that. Meditation only really shows it’s true power when you are consistent with it – just like exercise, keep it up. 

5. SELF CARE

The final one for me sounds so silly but I swear it makes me feel so much better. See going to get my nails done it’s like a form of therapy lol you come out feeling all bizz about your new nails. This could be anything from getting your hair cut, beard trimmed, a massage, having a really lovely bath with relaxing salts, candles and spa music. Just something that makes you feel good even though it’s only temporary, you’ll feel good for a short time. In fact I double dare you go to book in for a massage right now, or something that you love that is self-care-vibey. Do it. 

I hope this can help you if you have lost a little joy in your life lately. Life can be really hard at times but experiencing joy is so so so important. Im on the journey with you so just know you aren’t alone! I’ll get there and so will you 🥰. 

“Your work is to go forth into this physical environment looking for things that are a vibrational match to joy, connecting to source energy and then following with the inspired action” Abraham Hicks. 

Christmas is hard enough as it is, so don’t put pressure on yourself. You are so strong and you can get through anything I promise. Things will get better, I often view the hard times like a bow and arrow, they pull you back but they will  catapult you into something so amazing your brain won’t even be able to fathom it at the moment but it will be worth it. Keep going ❤️

SENDING YOU THE BIGGEST AMOUNT OF LOVE AND JOYFUL VIBES AND HUGS AND KISSES XXXXXX 😁😁😁😁😁SHARE